Paul

Ron, I know it sounds harsh, but God does not want her to live.

"Hello? Who's there, I'm talkin? Hello? Who is this? Baxter... is that you? Baxter! Bark twice if your in Milwaukee... Is this Wilt Chamberlain? Have the courage to say something! Hello?

There was a time, a time before cable. When the local anchorman reigned supreme. When people believed everything they heard on TV. This was an age when only men were allowed to read the news. And in San Diego, one anchorman was more man then the rest. His name was Ron Burgundy. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo. In other words, Ron Burgundy was the balls.

Brick Tamland is married with 11 children and is one of the top political advisors to the Bush White House.

Not so fast, you ingrates. Public News Team is taking a break from its pledge drive to kick some ass. No commercials, no mercy.

I'm proud of you fellas. You all kept your head on a swivel, and that's what you gotta do when you find yourself in a vicious cock fight.

It's a formidable scent. It stings the nostrils. I'm gonna be honest with you, Brian, that smells like pure gasoline.

Champ here! I'm all about havin' fun. You know, get a couple cocktails in me, start a fire in someone's kitchen. Maybe go to SeaWorld, take my pants off. Anyway, I kinda known for my catch phrase WHAMMY! As in Gene Tenace at the plate... iiittt WHAMMY! WHAMMY!

Mm. I just burned my tongue.

Today we spell "redemption"... R-O-N.

What do you say if we go out on a date? Have some chicken, maybe some sex... You know, see what happens.

This is worse than that time the raccoon got in the copier!

Let's go over the groundrules. Rule number 1: No touching of the hair or face... AND THAT'S IT!

I don't normally do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something. You have an absolutely breath-taking... heiney. I mean, that thing's good. I wanna be friends with it.

Ron Burgundy: Um, Brick, before I let you go, are you still having your celebrity golf tournament?

Brick Tamland: Um, no, no. Too many people died last year, so we're not gonna.

I'm Brick Tamland. People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I like to eat ice cream and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an I.Q. of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.

Where'd you get your clothes... from the... toilet store?

It's so damn hot... milk was a bad choice

I hate you, Ron Burgundy. I hate you.

Brian Fantana: That was one crazy party. I am hung over.

Champ Kind: I woke up on the floor of some Japanese family's rec room, and they would NOT stop screaming.

Brick Tamland: I ate a big, red candle.

Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight / Gonna grab some afternoon delight / My motto's always been, "When it's right, it's right" / Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?

Ambino

"I want you to start living as a gay women"

aaaaaaaaaaafffffffffffterrnoooon delight