Google Docs Version(it has colors and italics)- https://docs.google.com/document/d/1UWGUi0mRZ7-wC5gJRVIqTAAoB1V5pGoV6fB4p9041O8/edit?usp=sharing
Note: In order to preserve the identities of the users, fake names were given to them, it's also in the form of a script
A Prank Gone Wrong
(Our heroes are currently trapped in the hall of helm's deep with a table barricading the door. Excessive sounds of banging come from the door)[/i]
Pretty Face Guy: Are you sure you can’t use fly drake?
Fire Drake: I’m not a pokemon!!! I can’t just learn fly.
Septic Tank: How did we get here in the first place?
Pretty Face Guy (nervously): ummm…
(1 month ago in the Lobby of the Steam-Gamers building, Pretty Face Guy is conversing with fire drake and Septic Tank)
Pretty Face Guy: So I didn’t actually know if the Chinchilla lord actually had any chinchillas So I decided to send him some chinchillas.
Fire Drake: Why would you do that anyways?
Pretty Face Guy: I thought it would be funny to send him like a thousand chinchillas anyways.
Septic Tank: How did you get so many chinchillas in the first place? Well whatever, when is he supposed to get them?
Pretty Face Guy(looking at his phone): About now.
(The trio hear a loud unknown voice yelling “deereeeeeeee”)
Fire Drake (Confused): What was that sound?
Septic Tank: It was coming from the direction of chinchilla lord’s house.
Pretty Face Guy (Smiling): Oh don’t worry about that, I’ve got to show you guys my new doge.
(One month later, Pretty Face guy approaches a room with an image of a dog with a taco on its head. After knocking he is allowed in.)
Pretty Face Guy (approaching the desk): Hey Doc how-
Doc (interrupting and Irritated): I AM ONLINE SHOPPI- oh hey Pretty Face Guy, thanks for coming today.
Pretty Face Guy: No problem, what did you need me for?
Doc: Well do you remember chinchilla lord? Apparently he went missing for like a month already. I want you to go see him and make sure he isn’t dead alright?
Doc (Passing Pretty Face Guy a cage):Also take this doge with you, the rabie shots didn’t work on him, go use your useless cute face and take him away from here.
(Pretty Face Guy walked towards chinchilla lord’s house. The house appears to be empty with the front door unlocked. Pretty Face guy places the cage aside and enters Chinchilla Lord’s home)
Pretty Face Guy (walking): Chinchillaaaa looord? Helloooo? Are you there?
(Pretty Face Guy sees a diary on the table and begins to flip through the pages)
Chinchilla Lord: April 1, 20XX
Today the mailman came with a towering wooden box. I didn’t know what was in the box and decided to open it regardless however suddenly a blast of chinchillas broke out of the box and began to crash into me. DEEEEREEEE!!!! After escaping the pile on with my life the chinchillas began to occupy my home. I couldn’t go anywhere without seeing one in my sight. And the worst part was the stupid korean neighbor’s dog began howling which prompted all of the chinchillas to howl as well.
Chinchilla Lord: April 2, 20XX
Today the mailman came with another towering package, fortunately there was a label on it spelling out “Pet food”. Opening the package immediately the chinchillas (and the neighbor’s dog) formed a neatly organized circle around me and the package. I don’t know what to do - oh wait I’ve got an idea.
Chinchilla Lord: April 30,20XX
I almost completed the master plan to finally rid the world of Pretty Face Guy. After training my tiny army, I am ready to capture Pretty Face Guy and have the chinchillas **** on his face. Oh that reminds me, I ran out of pet food I might need to-
(The page appears to be bloody and torn demonstrating signs of a struggle. Sounds of growling start coming from the basement. Pretty Face Guy’s intuition forces him to immediately run out of the house screaming like a little girl. However he turns around to grab the doge in a cage before resuming his scream.)
(Meanwhile on ze_helms_deep the door is about to close in 30 seconds.)
Septic Tank (Yelling): Everyone get in the door is about to close!!!
Fire Drake: Hey Sept what happened to Pretty Face? I haven’t seen him all day?
(Down at the bottom of the ramp is Pretty Face Guy running with a cage in his hand with a scared to death expression)
Pretty Face Guy (Panicking and exhausted): Hey guys, I need to go to a panic corner be right back.
(As Pretty Face goes and panics in a corner, Sept and Fire Drake see a horde of chinchillas outside the door approaching the ramp. Sept immediately slams the door leaving half the humans outside to die by the hungry chinchillas)
Septic Tank (ignoring the screams outside): Alright everyone go to defensive positions, I want half of us to meet me at the wall, Fire Drake come with me once you get Pretty Face Guy out of the corner.
(Night time approaches, the humans standing over the wall look down to see legions of chinchillas across from them. Tied to some of the chinchillas are torches, spears and banners. Rain begins to fall)
(Silence fills the battlefield, in the middle of wall lies Septic Tank, to his left is Fire Drake and to his right is Pretty Face Guy with the cage in his hand)
Septic Tank (Breaking the Silence with an elvish tongue): Show them no mercy! For they are hungry for flesh.
Fire Drake: Hungry for flesh?
Septic Tank: Well that’s what Pretty Face Guy said.
(Tension fills the field all until one human fires a stray bullet at the legion prompting the battle to commence. The battle for the deep lasted several hours with the destruction of the wall and a chinchilla ram breaking down the doors our heroes retreated into the hall barricading it with a table)
Pretty Face Guy: Are you sure you can’t use fly drake?
Fire Drake: I’m not a pokemon!!! I can’t just learn fly.
Septic Tank: How did we get here in the first place?
Pretty Face Guy (nervously): ummm…
Septic Tank: Anyways Pretty Face Guy, you’re gonna have to give up the doge. We have to remove a mouth to feed in order to last for the night.
Pretty Face Guy (shrieking): No you can’t!!! We’ve seen hell together, he’s my best friend.
Septic Tank: He’s full of rabies!! Drake help me out here.
(Fire Drake restrains Pretty Face Guy while Septic Tank removes the cage from his hand and proceeds to toss it out the window. The trio look outside the window where the doge struggled to fight his way out of the horde before being buried by it)
Pretty Face Guy: Wow that was stunning.
(It is daytime and the trio is still trapped in the hall. There they argue over how to escape their current situation)
Pretty Face Guy: I’m sure we can just call Gandalf-
Septic Tank: He was eaten by the chinchillas!!! The holy light did not help him at all because it is too glitchy. We might as well have Drake fly and help us out.
Fire Drake: I’m a first gen pokemon so I can’t learn it.
Septic Tank: Wait I thought you said you weren’t a pokemon earlier well whatever. The main issue is that we are stuck here.
Pretty Face Guy: It’s not like we can trick the chinchillas to let us go right?
Fire Drake (With a lightbulb over his head): Trap them hmmmmmmmm. Questionable plan but what do you think Sept?
Septic (Receiving Fire Drake’s whisper) : You know that might actually just work. Hey Pretty Face, come here for a second.
(Pretty Face Guy is in a chinchilla suit tied to a rope hanging over the chinchilla horde looking at him with confusion. Sept and Drake hold onto the rope and prompt him to say his lines)
Fire Drake: Pretty Face it’s time to shine!!!! Do or die!!!!
Pretty Face Guy (weakly): Okay….
Pretty Face Guy (Using his charm): The last chinchilla standing can -----------*
*What he was about to say was censored due to the thought of what could potentially happen was too disgusting for the author to put down in words.
(Stimulated by Pretty Face’s charm, the chinchillas begin an all out brawl amongst themselves slowly thinning out the herd. Fire Drake and Septic Tank consume popcorn enjoying the scene as Pretty Face Guy flails around panicking over what could happen to him.)
(Meanwhile in the basement of Chinchilla Lord’s home)
Doc(annoyed): Dammit Pretty Face Guy you had one job! Hello is anyone down here.
(Doc finds Chinchilla Lord groaning on the ground weakly shouting “deereeee”)
Doc(relieved): oh you’re alive that’s good! Time to do some shopping.
(Doc leaves Chinchilla Lord on the ground and the scene fades in black)