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Repeat

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Everything posted by Repeat

  1. You're a butthead. Get out of my thread!
  2. Sex.

    lol wut
  3. Everyone has embarrassing moments! Post yours here so everyone can get some lulz! One of the most embarrassing things happened to me TODAY. The boss took me out to lunch and ordered us all really freaking spicy chicken wings. My stomach, having the stability of a biopolar menopausal woman who has just quit chain smoking, was terrified. I manned up and ate the wings. They were actually quite delicious. For a while. I could feel the hot greasy poison slipping down my throat and into my unsuspecting belly...gurgle. Oh God. This was going to be bad. When we got back to the office a few hours ago, I came back to my office and started thinking of ways to calm the impending destructive digestive storm. Took some Tums. Yum, fruit flavored. Gurgle. No dice. Drank some water. I'm pretty sure the water made it worse by spreading the oils all around my system. Gurgle Gurlge. No more than an hour after I had returned, the storm had arrived. And it wasn't just any storm. It was fierce and angry. It was a "Category HOLY FUCK!" poop hurricane. I ran to the bathroom and picked my favorite stall, grabbed a hold of the hand rails on the sides, and braced for impact. The levees burst and all hell broke loose. Sweating bullets, I start praying. I'm not praying for this to stop, I'm praying that God puts me out of my misery right then and there. 20 minutes go by. The eye of the storm arrives. I hear a door open. Fuck. The person that walks in mutters under his breath "damn..." and I know he is talking about the gaseous cloud of terrorizing terror and destructive destruction that he has unwillingly been engulfed in. Poor bastard. Finally I feel as if I'm okay. Little do I know the winds are calm in the eye of the storm. I reach for the toliet paper...it was all gone. Caught in the moment of dire need for the john I hadn't realized there was none. Fuck! No toliet paper where they usually keep the reserves in the cabinent above the toliet either...I'm pretty sure it was a conspiracy against me. That bathroom is always LOADED beyond belief with enough toliet paper to wipe the asses of several ancient armies and their horses. But today, noooo, none today. God was lulz'ing. Probably his revenge because I don't go to church. So what do I do? "Hey man, could you throw me a roll?" Unknown man that just entered: "uh...sure..." Me: "Thanks man you're a life saver" Man: "Bombs away here ya go" *roll flies over the top of the stall* Me (under my breath): "Oh thank God." I finish up and wash my hands. I leave the bathroom and who should be standing there? MY BOSS. 65 year old, white haired, fancy suit. Actually a pretty cool guy. "Outta toliet paper, huh? Rookie mistake, kid....chicken wings get to you?" Me: "Yes sir, thanks for the help...I'm kind of embarrassed..." Boss: "Yeah, that was pretty gross. Haven't smelled anything like that since college." Me: "Oh...haha...sorry." As soon as he left the eye of the storm was no longer over me and I had to run back in. I proceeded to walk back to my office in shame. Someone literally just stopped in and called me Wings. It has started to spread. Damnit. What a day! YOUR TURN!
  4. Fair enough, old bean. I just got upset because I felt that joking about his injuries was pretty sick - however innocent it may have been. It's all good. :001_smile: *takes back half of Jew's asshole points that he recieved this morning* You get to keep the other half because your siggy is so freaking huge! :001_tongue:
  5. Kix.

    That would be glorious... ...I'd have to eat them really fast so they wouldn't get soggy! Soggy Kix = Sickz RHYMED!
  6. <(I'm going to rape you!)

  7. I'd prefer if we met IRL.

     

    I'll be wearing dark sunglasses, a hat, and driving a white utility van with no windows. Don't worry, I have candy inside. We can eat candy together.

  8. Dude...that's over the line. (Where You are) ___________________ (Where you should be) Don't ever fucking make jokes about the man's physical limitations, that's complete bullshit. Normally you're pretty good about stuff, but you definitely get asshole points for that one.
  9. Sex.

    QFT pretty much the best thing ever.
  10. I'm 20 and I've never seen a pair of boobs... Girls scare me! They have cooties!
  11. amber alert!
  12. where the hell did the tags go? that was fun.
  13. Kix.

    I do not approve of the slaughtering of poor and helpless animals. You should be ashamed of yourself, Red Tampon. To condone the barbaric act of eating meat is disgraceful and sinful. :001_tt2: I fucking love steak. I like it bloody and delicious.
  14. ok

    Krochy is a booger. Bubba is awesome.
  15. Kix.

    I FUCKING LOVE KIX dunno wat u haterz be talkin bout
  16. Oopsies

    Silly wabbit, twicks are 4 kidz! GL
  17. YOUTUBE complains.

    Since forever duh
  18. Oh, the irony...

    does she like things?
  19. <( u have a hat)

  20. <( I want to lick you on the ear)

     

     

     

     

     

    Sorry dude I can't control what the old lady avatar says...

  21. <( Hi Raven!)

     

     

    My avatar said that!

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